"Dr Who, a Tardis, and a relocation": Women with Dissociative Identity Disorder reflect on barriers to identifying and disclosing their trauma

When the grim histories of people with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) come to light, many people wonder how these abuses can have gone on for so many years undetected. Surely if it was that bad, the child would tell someone, and that person would tell the authorities, and the perpetrators would be jailed? For some onlookers, the lack of effective intervention seems to confirm a disconcertingly widespread belief that the abuse simply didn't happen – the person with DID is unstable and detached from reality or is making it up for attention, money, or some other secondary gain. As Judith Herman (1992) warns, "It is very tempting to take the side of the perpetrator. All the perpetrator asks is that the bystander do nothing. He appeals to the universal desire to see, hear and speak no evil. The victim, on the contrary, asks the bystander to share the burden of pain." In this chapter, the reader is asked to share the burden of pain with twelve women with DID struggling with the aftermath of severe childhood abuse as we try to understand the complex and multifaceted reasons why they were not able to disclose their abuse or seek safety during childhood. These women bravely shared their stories in the hope that at least one child could be saved from a fate such as theirs. My wish is that their stories are heard by many and change minds, policies, and practices. The rich insights they provide about the formidable barriers to disclosing abuse and finding protection provide us with valuable knowledge that can inform strategies that assist children living in abusive situations navigate their way to a safer future.